You see it everywhere you go: In the quad, in Cook Hall and most
often in the dorms. No matter where it is, you turn your head and
think to yourself “get a room.”

For people living with others, this is something that should
seriously be considered. When it comes to public displays of
affection in front of the roommates, how much is too much?

I wish I had a simple answer to this question, but it’s slightly
more complex and conditional. Just remember that it’s about respect
for others and equally for yourself.

I realize that my viewpoint may reflect my traditional southern
upbringing, but the advice I will give on the topic really reflects
general rules of etiquette.

In essence, what you do sexually should be in private and being
in the dorm room with your roommate does not equal privacy. Privacy
specifically means without the company of others.

First of all, ask yourself, why in the world you would want your
roommate seeing you engage in such acts? I don’t know if people are
na�ve or just inconsiderate. Regardless, it creates a very
awkward situation, especially for the roommate.

Some people would confront you about it, but others might not
have the courage to. Needless to say, you’re not respecting their
privacy. And don’t assume that because they are asleep it’s OK,
because it’s not.

Just think, what if they awoke? Or better yet, what if you were
on the flip side and awoke to such an uncomfortable situation?

This brings forth the more complicated issue–establishing how
much is too much. I would argue that kissing isn’t bad, unless it’s
a full out make out session.

Rule of thumb: If there is tongue, you should probably move to a
place that is private.

As for other things, just think to yourself, “Would I want my
parents or other family members to see this?”

If you can sincerely answer yes, then you’re probably OK. If
you’re even questioning it, don’t do it!

Another thing to keep in mind, just because you and your
roommate are best friends in no way makes it a good idea.

I don’t want to see my best friend, just as much as I don’t want
to see strangers, engaging in public displays of affection.

You should try to work something out, if necessary, so that you
can have privacy.

Just make sure that you’re respecting their time as well as your
own.

And for heaven’s sake, don’t lock them out just to get some
alone time!

Bottom line, you should be thinking about the comfort level of
the person you’re living with. Yes, it may be a hassle at times,
but you can work something out.

If you simply can’t work something out, then you should get a
room. Hotels.com has some really cheap deals.

For the rest of you, thank you for observing the laws of
etiquette. They are in place to rid the world of needless
discomfort and make day-to-day interaction better.