I’ve come to the conclusion that sometimes I simply don’t know the right words to say.

This was the case Tuesday night. By now, everyone knows that former men’s basketball coach Lorenzo Romar announced his decision to leave Saint Louis University to assume the head coach position at the University of Washington.

But what the SLU community may not realize is the depth of the emotions triggered by Romar’s seemingly sudden move.

Romar is moving on to an incredible opportunity that most athletes can only dream of: returning to his alma mater to coach.

There is a shared sense of true happiness and excitement for Romar from all who had the honor of working with him on a daily basis, and even by those who had limited interactions with him, like me. But despite the happiness, there is a wistfulness that just hasn’t gone away yet for some of us.

Tuesday night, I stared at a blank piece of paper, hoping for some inspiration to write something truly amazing that could express how many of the players and others at SLU felt and the uneasiness that comes with not knowing the direction the program may take.

I began listening to the radio, and it hit me: I can’t find those perfect words. They have already been said, and I was listening to them.

And love is not the easy thing.

-“Walk On,” U2

Lorenzo Romar came to SLU in the spring of 1999 after a three-year run as head coach at Pepperdine (1997-1999).

In just three years, Romar was able to bring so much to the basketball program and to the St. Louis community.

On the court, he brought impressive victories and triumphs, including the first Conference USA crown in Billiken history during the 1999-2000 season.

Off the court, he was able to become an integral part of his players’ lives.

To say that he was more than a coach is an understatement. Romar truly loved his players as if they were his own sons, and it showed.

“(Romar) was like a brother and a father to everyone on the team,” junior guard Marque Perry said. “He was always in a good mood. You could tell him anything and talk to him about everything, and he was always there.”

Since Romar was so close to his team, it’s no surprise they knew of his decision to leave before it was officially announced at a press conference last Wednesday.

It’s also no surprise that reactions were charged with sentiment and scattered across the spectrum of emotions.

And if your glass heart should crack .

“We first found out from (Romar). He called us in for a meeting, and we had thought he was going to stay. He told us he was leaving, and we were mad and angry with him, because it seemed like he just up and left,” Perry said.

“We didn’t take time to think about the change in his life and the benefits for him and his family. Now, days later, we realize that others in his position would have left, too. He’s got friends there (in Washington), and it’s a good environment for him to be in.”

After the news settled in, many others began to see the situation in a different light.

“Everything was up in the air the week before,” said junior forward Chris Braun. “We were sad, but at the same time relieved to know the direction of things.”

But despite accepting Romar’s decision to leave and the emergence of true happiness for the incredible opportunity that has fallen upon Romar, sadness still lingers among members of the team.

It’s not there because of bitterness or animosity, it’s there simply because it’s hard to see a friend go.

“Of course I’m sad. Romar is the reason I came to SLU,” said junior forward Ross Varner, who was under Romar’s tutelage at Pepperdine. “But he’s such a good friend, and I’m very excited for him to have the opportunity to coach at his alma mater.”

Without knowing what the future holds, the Bills are at a turning point. They still are emotional about Romar’s departure, one look in any of their eyes and that is crystal clear. But they have to keep going.

Be strong . walk on .

Looking back at this season, the Billikens grew tremendously as a team.

They saw players change positions and find niches they never knew existed. They found leadership in places that may have been overlooked.

They found a chemistry of new and old talents that brings great excitement and hope for the next season.

Granted, a key part of the equation has moved on, but nothing and no one can take away the growth and accomplishments of the Bills.

“Despite what our record may show, we all improved a lot on an individual basis,” said junior guard Drew Diener. “Coach Romar had a lot to share with us since he was a great, great player, and we can all benefit from that and use it no matter what coach is here.”

If you talk to any member of the team, one thing becomes certain: Next year’s Billikens will be strong.

They have the ability to win the C-USA tournament and get a bid to the NCAA Tournament.

And most importantly, they have the determination to do so.